The Place Where I Work: Too Cruel To Be Kind
I thought I was going to have a case of the Mondays but my iPod, my Starbucks crew and MIT’s haircut changed all that.
This will be shocking- sometimes I am not as smart as I seem. I know. Filled out my timesheet last week all kinds of wrong. So this morning I had to chat with the CFO-haven’t thought of a clever name for him yet- about my brain malfunction. A brain malfunction that would’ve lined my pockets more and made me look like a thievin’ wretch. It was bothering me the WHOLE weekend that I had done this because I really had no intentions on being an idiot.So, I go into his office and explain why I suck and need to do my timesheet over. He smiles and is like, no worries…am sure it would’ve worked itself out. He was real laid back about it which leads me to believe this company is NOT hurting for a dollar. More importantly, he doesn’t think I am a thievin’ wretch and found it cute how worried I was…and also HOW DUMB my mistakes were. I explain with these cheekbones I don’t need to know much.
The CFO and I have funny kinda relationship. He crunches numbers and keeps things running smooth, but is also into design and see’s the importance of leaving early on Fridays. Throughout the day we say clever one liners to each other and think up various ways to piss off Vanilla Madeline-not so much piss him off, as ruffle his feathers. I am still trying to get invited to the Soho pad-the CFO may be option B because he just bought a new place in the city and was having furniture delivered on Friday. We discussed what he got and the dude has great design taste-he is straight. We shall see.
Anywho, today I don’t think MIT wants to kill me. Think he’s curious about me. I knew stuff that MIT didn’t think I would- like weird obscure science shit and I think it blew his mind. Now, he sniffs around me, smiles, stares and tries to get me to say something about his new haircut-which I think brings out his ears in a bad way. Since I am so real and believe in the whole if you don’t have anything nice to say thing…I haven’t said boo about the new haircut. MIT has slowly walked by my desk turning his head every which way. He has stopped and looked at the art on the walls (art that has been there EVERY DAY) by my desk. He has drummed a conversation by my desk about his weekend and getting a haircut.Still I play the strong n’ silent type. Who knows? This may be the thing that causes him to murder me and duplicate my cheekbone structure.
Oh well.
Vanilla Madeline is back. He was in San Francisco a few days last week. We spoke on the phone occasionally and he was slightly impressed with my French accent while saying his name.VM and I smirk at each other now. We both like wearing purple and I kinda like the way my name is said with his accent. Have to up my shoe game because he seems like the type of gay who’s into fierce heels. Must do what I can to be sipping mai tai’s on the balcony of his Soho crib. He’s going to serve fruit parfaits and we will Wii bowl together. Its going to be…a …gay …ole time. HA! OH! Another reason why he and I shall be the best of friends and he will let me house sit his luxurious apartment is because his lover’s name is Loy. Something about that name makes me giddy. I just picture them on Saturdays wearing light colored Bermuda shorts and tissue paper cotton v-neck tees. They walk to the West Village for gelato, then hold hands on the water front. They compare themselves to other couples around and note how significantly HOTTER they are, and how everyone else wants them. *sigh*For The Fuck of It strolled in. We chatted. He strolls about the office practically whistlin’ Dixie. I’m trying to expand on our conversations so that I have that IN with the male children in his life.
Wish me luck.
I must be doing something right or their standards are low, but I may be extended here. YESSSIR. This not only means MIT has more opportunity to plot, but I’ll have more character development…and more importantly MORE MONEY.
This will be shocking- sometimes I am not as smart as I seem. I know. Filled out my timesheet last week all kinds of wrong. So this morning I had to chat with the CFO-haven’t thought of a clever name for him yet- about my brain malfunction. A brain malfunction that would’ve lined my pockets more and made me look like a thievin’ wretch. It was bothering me the WHOLE weekend that I had done this because I really had no intentions on being an idiot.So, I go into his office and explain why I suck and need to do my timesheet over. He smiles and is like, no worries…am sure it would’ve worked itself out. He was real laid back about it which leads me to believe this company is NOT hurting for a dollar. More importantly, he doesn’t think I am a thievin’ wretch and found it cute how worried I was…and also HOW DUMB my mistakes were. I explain with these cheekbones I don’t need to know much.
The CFO and I have funny kinda relationship. He crunches numbers and keeps things running smooth, but is also into design and see’s the importance of leaving early on Fridays. Throughout the day we say clever one liners to each other and think up various ways to piss off Vanilla Madeline-not so much piss him off, as ruffle his feathers. I am still trying to get invited to the Soho pad-the CFO may be option B because he just bought a new place in the city and was having furniture delivered on Friday. We discussed what he got and the dude has great design taste-he is straight. We shall see.
Anywho, today I don’t think MIT wants to kill me. Think he’s curious about me. I knew stuff that MIT didn’t think I would- like weird obscure science shit and I think it blew his mind. Now, he sniffs around me, smiles, stares and tries to get me to say something about his new haircut-which I think brings out his ears in a bad way. Since I am so real and believe in the whole if you don’t have anything nice to say thing…I haven’t said boo about the new haircut. MIT has slowly walked by my desk turning his head every which way. He has stopped and looked at the art on the walls (art that has been there EVERY DAY) by my desk. He has drummed a conversation by my desk about his weekend and getting a haircut.Still I play the strong n’ silent type. Who knows? This may be the thing that causes him to murder me and duplicate my cheekbone structure.
Oh well.
Vanilla Madeline is back. He was in San Francisco a few days last week. We spoke on the phone occasionally and he was slightly impressed with my French accent while saying his name.VM and I smirk at each other now. We both like wearing purple and I kinda like the way my name is said with his accent. Have to up my shoe game because he seems like the type of gay who’s into fierce heels. Must do what I can to be sipping mai tai’s on the balcony of his Soho crib. He’s going to serve fruit parfaits and we will Wii bowl together. Its going to be…a …gay …ole time. HA! OH! Another reason why he and I shall be the best of friends and he will let me house sit his luxurious apartment is because his lover’s name is Loy. Something about that name makes me giddy. I just picture them on Saturdays wearing light colored Bermuda shorts and tissue paper cotton v-neck tees. They walk to the West Village for gelato, then hold hands on the water front. They compare themselves to other couples around and note how significantly HOTTER they are, and how everyone else wants them. *sigh*For The Fuck of It strolled in. We chatted. He strolls about the office practically whistlin’ Dixie. I’m trying to expand on our conversations so that I have that IN with the male children in his life.
Wish me luck.
I must be doing something right or their standards are low, but I may be extended here. YESSSIR. This not only means MIT has more opportunity to plot, but I’ll have more character development…and more importantly MORE MONEY.
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