Saturday, December 17, 2011

And Then I Took My Earrings Off!

I don't pretend to be some gangsta bitch-mostly because I am vain and would rather spend hours in Sephora deciding what blue eyeliner works best with my chocolate brown eyes.
This doesn't mean that if/when people get out of line with me that I won't proceed to: attempt to punch them in the throat, tell them in explicit details about themselves, kick them in the shins, tell them about themselves in explicit details while kicking and punching them.
Then there are the times I get real BROOKLYN on dat assssssss. Something comes over me and my true "blackness" comes out. It is a time when I stop being (ethnically) ambiguous and things start getting real!

So last night I was at a friends birthday party at a bar in Brooklyn. Things were chill and times were good...but then a bitch always has to show up and be ruiner of good times.
This butta-faced twat looked down on Brooklyn (she lives in the Bronx)and insulted my friends because she is a horrible person and an unattractive cunt. Then I realized that when she was calling Brooklyn ghetto (we were on friggin' 4th ave and Sackett street!!!! which to those who don't know is about as ghetto as a darkened Apple store)she was looking at me dead in my eyes! That bitch!
Luckily for her I was 'locked in' in a booth so I couldn't get out and let my foot have access to her ass.
My BROOKLYN came out...and there was neck twisting, finger snapping- Harry (everyones favorite Jewish gay hater) said it was like watching a Tyler Perry movie. Things got serious when I took my earrings off!!
I had on mini door knocker earrings which made me EXTREMELY Brooklyn! Ahh!! I took them off and mentioned kicking her ass up and down 4th avenue. Admittedly I had a lot of vodka last night.

It was very entertaining seeing-well hearing that part of myself. The moral of the story though, is that bitches like that need to get punched or they will continue with their bitchery...and when the earrings come off shit will forever be really real!

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