Tuesday, October 1, 2013

A Chronicles of Cashmere Story: That Thing Called Karma

As I fell down the the stairs I realized that this would be how I died.
It's not that my life flashed before my eyes either, just a sudden feeling of dread and the inevitable.  I almost felt strangely at peace...until I remembered what led up to this moment.  The moment when I die.

It all began with me sitting at a cafe in the West Village waiting for my blind date to show.  My friend Dave decided to set me up with his friend who was new in town and so impossibly nice I wouldn't be able to find a single thing wrong with him.  Being a woman who loves a good challenge, I accepted this blind date.  So there I was waiting for Derek to show up.  Watching the door with the casual alarm I felt whenever I was in this situation.  Waiting for a date.
Admittedly, I was a serial dater only because I didn't know what I wanted.  I just knew that the guys I had various coffees, drinks and dinners with were not what I wanted.
Just as I take another tepid sip of my iced hazelnut latte, I notice a guy enter the cafe who seemed like he was looking for someone.  Our eyes lock and there is a recognition.  He walks towards me still giving me time to access him...and cut him down.
He is tall and has a confident walk.  He seemed focused...and I'd have to say he was handsome.  I find myself standing to greet him.

"Alice?"  His voice is deep, almost like a purr.

I hold out a hand, "Yes.  Derek I assume..."  He takes my hand and kisses the back of it instead of shaking it.  Oh, he was going to be a smooth one.  We sit opposite each other, still taking each other in.  His smile is slow and remains on his face even as he speaks.

"Dave was right, you are gorgeous.  I am so glad I didn't psyche myself and not meet with you."  His eyes never leave mine, it makes me feel like he is zeroing in.

"Thank you.  He didn't say much about you...just that you are really nice.  Are you going to get anything?"  I like to judge a man by the type of coffee he drinks.

"Nothing for me...now."  He says.

The next few moments he relentlessly stared at me, it was a probing stare.  An almost frightening stare.  I sipped my coffee and thought about the many ways I would verbally malign Dave. Sure, this Derek was great looking, but staring at me creepily was not sexy nor was it going to get him a second date.

Finally he asks, "So how do you know Dave?"
This would be interesting.  I explain how Dave and I once worked together and how he asked me out after two months of coffee breaks and one happy hour.  I let him down easy because I thought he was nice, but way too short to consider having kids with.  He would be a great guy friend to have though in case I needed guidance with someone that actually had a chance with me.
I went on to tell about the time Dave finally moved on from me and started dating a girl named Priscilla.  He seemed really into Priscilla, so much so he asked her to marry him....this was when I reconsidered dating Dave.  I don't know what happened, I just saw him in a different more commitment worthy light.  So, like any romantic movie heroine I told him how I felt at the most inopportune moment- at his bachelor party as I was the one female invited besides his lesbian cousin Janet.  Dave called off the wedding and we dated for a bit until I met his brother Steve who moved from San Francisco for work.
There was no denying the chemistry Steve and I had...at least I didn't want to deny it, Steve did.  It was a completely messy situation, but the heart wants what it wants and all that.

"You dated his brother?"  Derek interrupts.  He didn't seem judge-y, just curious.

"Well, I cheated on Dave with his brother and then dated his brother until he asked me to move with him to London where I just couldn't see raising children with that obnoxious accent."  I sipped my coffee and wondered if my murky past was all so that I could meet Derek...

"How are you and Dave still friends?"  He asks.

"Well..he forgave me eventually.  It helped that his brother moved to London- in the end, Dave just wants me to be happy."

"Perhaps...would you like to take a short stroll and then have dinner?  I know this great spot..."   He stands and stretches a little.

"After the amazing story of Dave and I....you still want to go to dinner?"

"Of course I do.  I just asked how you knew him- listen, if he's willing to set you up on a blind date after all of that, then there must be something amazing about you."  He smirked and held out a hand to me.  I took it and stood up.  He was damn charming

Once outside, he guides me with a hand on the small of my back.  It had been a while since I'd been this close to date...a stranger...a male companion.  He smelled spicey and masculine.  Maybe I was getting ahead of myself, but I felt that karma paid me back for practically destroying Dave with all those horrific dates I went on, and now with Dave setting me up with Derek, the karma wrath was over.
I was so deep in thought I hadn't noticed that we were walking to a deserted part of town.

"So...which restaurant are we going to?"  I ask, looking at all the abandoned buildings.  Crackheads weren't even milling about.  Perhaps this was one of those up and coming neighborhoods with a restaurant in an abandoned crack den- anything for exposed brick.

Silently, Derek snatches my purse from my arm and before I can respond he pushes me down some stairs leading to a subway station.  I still can't believe how no one is around...more importantly I cannot scream as I think my neck is broken.
As I lay dying, I feel the thud of my bag hitting my back.  Though fuzzy, I see Derek's black shoes appear in front of my face.  What was happening?  Why?
He leans down and whispers, "Dave never forgave you and paybacks a bitch....or me.  A hired gun.  You're gasping for air now, you'll be dead and this will all be over soon.  A victim of robbery. Tsk tsk.  Still I feel this was too kind for you.  Too kind."  His feet disappear.
Everything goes black.  Karma really is a bitch.

The End.                                            

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