Tuesday, January 3, 2012

As The Online Dating World Turns: ...Uh....Yeah

Alright. I am nearing that part of the game where I kill the account- AGAIN!
Damn me.

Okay, it's not all the way me. There are a lot of lame, crazy, killa-type dudes online...and the thing is, I meet these SAME dudes in the streets, on the train, at lounges even if I am sitting in a corner alone and scowling.
I've said this before and then have deleted my account.

The latest (and not nearly greatest) is this dude who happens to be a tatted, hair stylist. My interest was piqued...till I read his introductory email-which I almost didn't read because it was written like this:

hello I'm going to try my hand at being somewhat sane...BUT I AM REALLY CRAZY AND WILL SHOW YOU BY WRITING THE REST OF THIS MESSAGE IN ALL CAPS!

Which is what he did.

He also mentioned me in liquid leggings, me being his ace and his moms-not that he wanted me to be his mami, but that I seemed like someone he could tell his moms about.
What?
Dude you really don't know if I had 10 kinds of dicks in my mouth the night before AFTER killing a basket of kittens...and you mentioning moms?
Because I like to keep myself entertained and feel I am worthy enough to bring home to moms, so I reply back to him mentioning that his email was a tad overwhelming and that I would rather eat dirty needles than wear liquid leggings (something about seeing too too many sluts in them).
I figured maybe he was nervous and that I could pull that lil bit of sanity out of him.
I was wrong.
He attempted humor and delved deeper into insanity so I decided to just stop responding because I don't want to end up being dead chick in a Lifetime movie.

So that happened and the one dude that was cool wants to be....friends.
Yeah.
Then I am waiting for the train contemplating an island get-a-way when I see thee best looking dude I have seen in a minute! He was out of this world-with lips....and he got off of the train he was on so he could wait on the platform with me, but I had to get on the train because I was cold and had a Chopped (best show on Food Network) to watch.
I know it was supposed to end with digits exchanged and his lips somewhere near my neck BUT this is ME and I get so focused on non-cockly things....which is another reason why I am single.

Anyways, this all leads me to being like- THE HELL WITH THIS! Will give this online thing maybe 1 more month and then DAS IT. Imma just do me- which means meeting these same types of dudes in life and going straight 'predator mode on that ass' (as Ru says).

....just means cats and more cats.

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