The Time I Went To See Django Unchained



Let me start by saying that you will be offended.  I mean, this is me folks.  You should know this by now.

So, I went to see Django Unchained with my friend Ru and because we deal with various types of bigotry on a daily basis- I am an ethnically ambiguous Black woman and he is a 'blasian' looking Dominican gay male- we both were kinda/sorta excited about seeing some racist assholes who happened to be White get shot by a freed slave.
Listen, the day before I walked into a Dunkin Donuts in my neighborhood. It might have been Christmas day which explains the lack of violence on my part- anyways, I walk into the DnD and get on line.  This woman walks by me.  She is older and White, she looks at me and then says to her friend: you know what movie I was watching, Roots!
I glare at her and she smiles.  Her friends says: that is my FAVORITE movie!
Really bitch?!  Is it?  Your favorite movie?!
I began trembling with the want to choke some old tricks...but it was Christmas...and...my mom expected me home and not in jail.
Perhaps I was calm because I knew I was going to see Django kill some white folks...who had it coming.

I went into the movie expecting the usual Tarrantino thing, and I enjoy the 'Tarrantino thing'- and strangely I feel that even with the touchy topic of slavery, Tarrantino can do his 'thing' without making me want to kick him in the throat.
He came through with an amazing Western, with amazing acting and in between the usual campy comedy, dealt with some harsh realities.  A lot of #real talk.  A lot of jokes where you couldn't all laugh together (meaning White peeps better lay low) and be jolly because it was some touchy shit- but that's Tarrantino.  That's how he rolls and why I like him.
There was great action with a great story.  My love for Christoper Waltz (his character Dr. King Schultz, nice Tarrantino) just grows n' grows.  He is such an intricate actor and so engaging.
Also, Leonardo DiCaprio- I never gave two halves of a fuck about him, I mean, he's a good actor, but I just never a gave fifth of a fuck.  In this movie though, I felt him!  Not in a sexual way, in a way where I saw something that made me wanna maybe give a fuck.  That's big!

Then there is a scene where Django's (Jamie Foxx) jangly meats are shown, its not a pleasurable scene, but there were balls n' shaft.  Ru turns to me and says: Jamie Foxx has a big penis.
I agreed and seemed to forget about what was going on with the film- listen people, y'all seem to forget that I live a somewhat 'Downtown Abbey' life so seeing some fine penistry leaves me a lil feeble minded.
All in all, Django Unchained is a highly entertaining, provocative movie.  See it and talk amongst your friends- can we also say that I am into the the costumes in this movie.  Rugged, trim-cut (not skinny), sorta nut huggin' slacks...with a cowboy hat. Mmmmmm.

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