Saturday, February 5, 2011

The Time I Went To See Das Racist AKA Remembering When I Was Cool

There was a time when I was FUCKIN' AWESOME. I know, I know- I am pretty swell now, but back in the day (like 4 or 5 years ago) I was FUCKIN' AWESOME.
Would go see amazing shows because I didn't hate crowds of people so much and had more patience. I also would drink to numb the hate rising inside of me. Also didn't care about rolling into work hungover and shitty looking- because I NEVER LOOKED shitty. I was younger and resilient.
Now, it's a whole other bag of dicks.
If I don't get the proper amount of sleep AND I drink- I awake bloated, swollen and looking like I don't know what moisturizer or concealer is.

When Margo asked if I wanted to attend a Das Racist show with her- I was like cool. Surprising, but I liked these dudes. Plus, back when I was FUCKIN' AWESOME- Margo was right there with me.
Together we had dinner and reminisced about being cool..then walked to the Highline Ballroom to catch the show. We limited ourselves to 2 drinks (because of the whole swollen thing) and ventured into the crowd. Now Margo predicted that the crowd would be mostly White...and probably hipster. I agreed. She was proven right- except the White peeps we deemed cool by bringing Black people with them!
Margo was one of those cool people (I'm Black remember)-then this White guy rolled in with this Black chick...who's hair was alll natural (meaning no perm). Now I have a slight perm because my hair is so thick...and I want to be able to do it proper...because if I don't look good, then shit ain't right.
..sadly, Margo lost the 'be cool and bring a Black person' game.
There were a few Indians (because 2 of the dudes in the group are Indian) sprinkled in the crowd...but a whole lot of nerds, hipsters and assholes in the crowd made the experience kinda...ugh. It also made Mags (Margo) and I thankful we've outgrown the whole being cool thing- and aren't like some peeps our age still caught up in the bullshit. Now, I am not saying we can't have's a different kind...or have 'once in a while' type of thing. Like going to shows or drinking Patron all night and waking up with a bloodied knife in your hand.

Jasmine Solano was one of the opening acts AND DJi'ing. She was moving the crowd, Mags and I were feeling her...then Mags poetically stated: I didn't pay 10 bucks to see some Jasmine Solano.
I agreed. She was on for too too long!
There was another opening act, a dude named Danny Brown. He had a perm, an ill (BAD) haircut, silk shirt and white jeans on. Basically the makings of a dude I would hate- though I LOVE Andre 3000 (though he has a perm and wears silver lame`, he is mad talented and HOT)I blamed him for this. This Danny Brown, at first, was funny and his beats were sick. THEN like Ms. Solano, it got old and we grew bored. There's only soooo many times you can hear about a bitch sucking you off and you don't care (that would be a rap from Mr. Brown).
Usually when I'm at a show and left un-entertained by who's on stage, I try to find a hot aka potential mindfuck to focus on. There were NONE in this crowd. This made me yearn for my bed and a DVD.

Finally after another round of female DJ's-along with Ms. Solano, there was this other DJ...I don't recall her name, but she had on the most ill-fitting jeans. Will call her DJ IllJeans. I guess we were supposed to be amazed by her 'skills'. Wow, look at her go. She turned on her computer...and went down her iTune music list...oh wait!-she just threw her arms in the air!!! Wow.
See this is why I HATE that cerrato/serrano/I don't give a fuck what the name is because it makes me angry. Like I get it. Who wants to carry around a shit ton of records????
...but NOW EVERYONE is a DJ. Now even more mediocre people think they are good at something, something that anyone with 2 fingers and a computer can do. Fuck that! It's boring and makes me BOIL OVER WITH ANGER!!!!!!!!! Where was I??
Okay, so Das Racist comes out looking like some dudes. Like dudes I see on the Q train) getting off at Kings Highway (Brooklyn) going to each others house to play Grand Theft Auto and drink YooHoo's.
In other words, they were awesome. They opened with "Who's That Brown?"- (one of my faves) and really brought the energy levels up. The ultimate nerd in me was wayyyy too excited about the Aeon Flux (amazing cartoon) playing in the background. It was great to was some Flux and hear them.
Unfortunately, because I am older, wiser, more responsible, and VAIN...I could only stay for a couple of songs. From what I saw though...would've TOTALLY enjoyed the whole thing, probably punched someone the fuck out and would've bought a t-shirt.

I am not that cool anymore I left on a high note and got some zzz's.


  1. You forgot the stoopid boy wearing feathers on his head. Fun times!!

  2. UGH...or his friend with the upturned visor!!!
    thought we were at a rave for a second....