Monday, October 11, 2010

Three Way.

This should also be called: Lazy Blog.
Basically it's been an assraping Monday-but I definitely had a brief moment of clarity- I was able to chat with B and E. Definitely a highlight to the day!

B = friend, lover of felines, partner in high crime, ex-coworker x's dos (meaning we worked together at 2 previous jobs)

E = casual acquaintance, future ghost sex-er, a favorite text buddy, used to work with B and I at a previous job


me: now its a party

E: aw jeez

B: oh my god THREEWAY!

me: no aw jeez- all weekend no vids!
YES!! finally. I knew this would happen one day (in regards to 3way)

B: I'm gonna be honest here. I don't know how I feel about this.

E: why?

me: 3way? or E not supplying the ghost sex tape?

B: Yes. Yes to all of it.

me: dude, it was bound to happen...and E will fall asleep in about 2 secs...and then you and I can discuss Bones n' shit

E: no smoke?

B: Yeah (Honey T/me), this isn't one instant where you can make an exception to the tule?
HA
rule, rather.
....hahaha, tule.

E: do you guys just wanna have your own convo and leave me out

me: never E, chat..

E: why do you have to bring me into this, I'm busy

B: and what, I'm sitting on my thumb? I'm booking like, eight conference rooms right now!

me: dude, ordering oxfords from abercrombie & fitch ain't work, yo

E: yea but it makes me look busy

me: ....i was busy...and now i am not

B: (Honey T/me) look at E pretending like he doesn't love this.

me: I KNOW! he gets 1 year older and 1 chest hair n' thinks he's the shit

B: this is what happens when your girlfriend has yet to become a woman. You get notions.

E: ...and a ball hair. oh btw home boy is single and ready to mingle. hide yo daughters hide yo wives

me: good for you E! we should go for dacquiri's!! ebomb's rapin everybody!

B: Whoa dude - I'll sound the alarm!

me: hahahaahha

B: he needs practice - hence the ghost sex!

E: now it all makes sense

me: yes! especially if you ever plan on dating WOMEN and not 12 yr olds. sex game has to be tizzight.

B: See? We're secretly helping you all along.

me: like fairy godmothers n' shit

E: its like a cycle

me: cycle?

E: yea why dont you fairy godmothers hook up boy up then

me: well what's your type? amish? kim kardashian-ish (i.e. whore), blondes? black chicks? ricans?

E: thin blond chicks. what are you working with...got anything in stock? and you know i am with the age... like to have one hand in the cradle

B: I think we should set him up with that mormon girl who was kidnapped.
Elizabeth Smart. She plays the harp and was a sex slave.

E: ewww! thats messed up, i feel dirty

B: what? Kidnapped girls need love too, E.

E: not from me

me: seriously

E: i'm looking for a girl with a degree

me: and she won't mind the ghost sex-she's seen worse

B: Elizabeth Smart graduated from BYU. She's smart, dude!

me: holla!

E: yea but shes a freak. like messed up

me: she prolly doesn't mind a good donkey punch either

B: I thought dude's were into baggage!

me: me too

E: not me so much. i'm more of the nice girl from a good family that enjoys sailing, and red wine

me: hmmm hence 12 yr olds. hhahhahahhahahhaha- i mean..uh huunh

E: wait (Honey T/me) "mee too" that means you enjoy a donkey punch from time to time too?

B: so you want to date the idea of j crew model?

E: yea why not? dont you?

me: no, i meant i thought men were into baggage as well
no, white people suck

E: uh huhhhh

me: except for B of course

E: i hate white ppl

B: it's true, I am awesome.

E: i voted for obama

me: hahahhahaha HAHAHHAHAHA

E: hah

me: and now you regret it teabagger!

B: E aren't you Muslim?

E: WAS! muslim now jew! shalom biotch

B: whoa, that just happened.

me: okay...B, i am thinking a girl who goes to like nyu but works at sephora and seriously reads them shopaholic books like literature.
shalom!!

E: wait who is this girl?

me: the girl B and i are going to find for you when we're not out getting deeply dicked.

E: and yes, i would def date a girl that owns confessions of a shopaholic dvd collectors edition


me: see!

B: I was gonna say - I have no time to get
E ass! I need to get myself ass!

E: your a girl getting ass is easy, open your legs

me: puhlease- there's a difference between getting ass and getting deeply dicked

B: whoa dude.

E: yea


B:
crap - guys, I've gotta cheese it for a bit - work beckons.

E: lemme know what you find. ill be here

me: yeah and i've gotta get my afternoon fix. brb. E will see what i see on the streets.

E: ok cool

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