The Place Where I Work: Oh No She Didn't!

Yes. She. Did!
Baby Arm Me has gone the EXTRA mile and got herself some bangs (did she cut them herself?)! Two weeks ago I got a haircut which included some face pleasing bangs. Everyone has bangs you say but I am calling bullshit on this because she got hers like yesterday! After two weeks of watching me get.it (and by get.it I mean causing more of the office sleaze to mess their slacks) even in the rain, she wants in and got herself some bangs!
What’s saving her from getting long disdainful looks from me is that mine are better- hers look good on her but I win because I am an all around better person AND my cheekbones. Try to go against my cheekbones-and I feel comfortable in saying that- you will LOSE every single time! Except if you’re Naomi Campbell or Angelina Jolie or something…that might be a battle. Otherwise, forgettaboutit!
Some say that copying is a form of flattery but I think it’s fucked up and she is like 3 steps from moving in on my Clark Kent arena. Then I’ll have to cut a bitch. She can have Taye Diggs and whomever else tickles her fancy, but CK is MINE. Well, it’s not like we’re gonna fight by a pool for him but I would totally close some elevator doors in her face and trip her on the escalator.
I think Baby Arm Me should reevaluate her situation and realize it isn’t worth it. She should also realize it is a losing battle-two words: cheek.bones.

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