Wednesday, September 16, 2009

The Place Where I Work: TV Life

There are many days I wish I had a camera following me because people wouldn't believe the things that REALLY happen to me- and that my life is like a dramedy...or a sitcom on cable because I like to curse and am perverted. The humor of a 15 year old boy I tells ya.
I am about to make a BIG reveal. We all know I keep all things anonymous in my work blogs, but I HAVE to reveal the area I'm working in so there is understanding, PLUS today's stories happened only because of the area.
Okay, without giving EXACT locales or the company I am working for- am working within or around the confines of Rockefeller Center.
There's me, and the Today show cast. Chillin'. Okay...I wasn't chillin'. Being the savvy professional I am, I gave myself a TON of time to get there and look for the all important Starbucks...and just in case I got lost. Which I did, but more on that later.
So, I find MY Starbucks and am impressed at how stress-less it is (no heroine nodders though:( ). Everyone was quick and pleasant...AND Travis McCoy (Gym Class Heroes, music group) works there!
No, THE REAL Travis doesn't work there (he should because the music thing? really??), but this dude looks a lot like him Piercings, crazy hair, height and ALL!
The morning is going RIGHT. I am EARLY and Travis n' the crew have hooked me up!
Once inside one of the buildings that make up Rockefeller Center...or Plaza...hmmm...anywho, I find a security guard who wrongly informs me of where I have to go. I then get whisked away by another guard who works with the Dr. Oz show...who thinks I am a guest! After a few moments things get cleared up and I bump into this music writer Toure`...I've read his stuff in Vibe mag and have seen him on TV whenever something significant happens with Black musicians.
He stops his conversation and says 'hi' to me. I say 'hi' back...and must recall if we've ever met before. I am racking my brain. Toure` is staring. I nod n' smile again-keeping it friendly just in case we have he is a cuteyyyyy.
Being ALMOST on the Dr. Oz show was only the beginning of my being lost saga, but eventually I found where I was supposed to go.
This is when I am greeted by the Trifecta. Nate Berkus (you know, Oprah's amazing design make-over dude AKA the dude I would totally 'fag hag' it out for!!)-well the dude looks like him, Joan Claytinez (she is the latina version of Joan Clayton, a character from the GREAT show Girlfriends) and Oh Her- she is just that girl you'll forget as soon as she walks away. The Trifecta gives me the lay of the land-including the...wait for it...Rocketeria. Yes, that would be what the cafeteria is called and yes it has EVERYTHING. Including A-Game, the lady who cleans the cafeteria and teaches life lessons. She immediately chats me up when I stumble into the Rocket like a lost lamb. A-Game is good people.
While showing me around Joan Claytinez mentions how she is going to steal my bag. I thank her for the compliment and through a smile say...nahhhh kid! Can't steal from BROOKLYNNNNNN!
Nate Berkus-not sure if THIS one is gay, but he did giggle a lot when Oh Her kept saying he was MY MAN! Nate and I are working together on this project. Not fun. He is cool and we vibe with sarcasm.
Nate was a nice distraction from me staring at the clock-which barely moved. Ugh. Luckily I also sit near the Gang of Guys and Crispin Long. The Gang of Guys...are a gang of...guys. Yeah, much like the soccer place-a lot of DUDES, BUT these dudes aren't hot which made the day seem slower. *le sigh* They also burp a lot. Out loud.
Now, Crispin Long is a close 3rd for being my favorite (A-Game then Nate). His name is a mix of Crispin Glover (the dude who screamed n' sniffed hair in the Charlies Angels remake...and he was in that rat movie) and Justin Long (the MAC guy who is bumping uglies with Drew Barrymore)-this guy looks like a mix of them. Very lanky, and could be creepy, but totally isn't. He has pics of his kids up and he's an executive assistant. I like that. He also snacks on a ziplock of homemade cookies. I like that too.
Crispin likes to read celeb gossip sites and troll obscure Japanese art sites. He also eats A LOT and is rail thin, which fascinates me.
Another character who may or may not be a regular because she seems nice, but stays in her simply Staten Island or SI. She is overly browned (not natural), has crunchy high hair, fake boobs and wears heels suitable for the OLD Westside Highway. HOW COULDN'T I *heart* her??

After lunch (where I ran into Travis McCoy outside smoking, he nodded and smiled)and going HOURS without internet-because I am trying to be a good temporary employee....and my connection was effed up for some reason, I sat there and REALLY thought to myself: who do I have to fuck around here to get some internet?
Enter TechSexy (think of it like Prince's album LoveSexy).
I met TechSexy briefly in the morning. There was a recognition of hotness on both accounts, but I am a professional!
Practically LOSE MY SHIT when TechSexy appears after my DEEP thought...holding a keyboard. He smiles a dimpled smile- OH, he is about 6ft, shaved head and the color of butterscotch...mmmmmm- and I stare at him wide eyed and try not to laugh...which of course causes him to give me a look that reads: I may have wanted to penetrate you before, but now...maybe just a fingerbang.
Hmmm. We shall see. Shall watch TechSexy from afar, yet be earnest with my NEED for internet!! Hopefully this won't equate with me being bent over a copy machine....


  1. ha - nothin' wrong with gettin' banged out on a copy machine here and there! just don't hit copy.

    L makes fun of me for watching girlfriends, but i sneak it when he's not around. how can you not? i heart joan.

  2. Girlfriends is seriously one of the best shows to be on tv EVER. Ever. I *live* for the Sunday morning reruns on Oxygen (although it was never the same after Toni left).

  3. You're right, the 'post Toni' years were a bit off, but still A GREAT SHOW!!!:)

    If TechSexy does things right, then I won't know WHAT buttons I'm hittin'...haaahahahhah!