Thursday, August 13, 2009

The Not So Oscar Rundown...

This won’t be a TRUE rundown because I find I need to focus when watching the Oscars. Like I am really there and nominated- okay mostly I just didn’t feel like doing a rundown. Call it laziness. Call it I just wanted to stare at the dresses. Call it whatever you want…this doesn’t mean I wasn’t left without any lasting impressions or observations.

The Oscars were not so boring this year proving that 2009 truly is the year of CHANGE! Even when it was dull, it wasn’t flip to see what’s on the Food Network dull. That’s really all you can ask for. Hugh Jackman definitely did one of my favorite opening numbers-mostly because he sang that he is WOLVERIIIIINNNNE. That did it for me.I also liked the involvement of Anne Hathaway because I just like her. In all her big eyed, big teeth-ness.
The close-ups of Brangelina did get TIRESOME within the first 5mins of the show!!! Come on people- I did wish Jen (Aniston) brought it with the dress. I mean, it isn’t like she has anything to prove, but for real…she should’ve BROUGHT. IT. The slumbered hair-Emmy’s dress thing is NOT a good look when that she-minx Angelina is sitting front row center looking FIERCE (loved her green accessories). Sure, John Mayer is less wrinkly than Brad which makes him a better accessory, but Brad Pitt is…well…Brad Pitt!! So, sorry Jennifer Anniston, you lose (again). Awww!
I did enjoy Ben Stiller’s ode to Joaquin Phoenix…and that Tina Fey n’ Steve Martin made fun of Scientology to a room full of future converts. Gutsy and hilarious. Having the past winners announce and say something special (either genuinely or FORCED) was pretty great. I got teary eyed a few times because it would be amazing to have peers I admired say that they think I’m special. Or just having DeNiro (Robert) say hi to me would be OKAY!Though I want to punch him in the face, I liked Cuba Gooding Jr.’s jibes at RDJ (Robert Downey Jr.)- who looked so handsome!

More importantly, lets talk dresses. The standouts- to me- were Taraji P. Henson, Natilie Portman and Alicia Keys. Heidi Klum was close too. I didn’t HATE anyone’s outfit- though I squinted at Tilda Swintons ensemble. I also thought I liked Miley Cyrus’s dress, but in hindsight I feel her house Negro could’ve found better curtains.I appreciated Mickey Rourkes white suit and the Hoffster’s (Phillip Seymour Hoffman) beanie. He is true to his drug addict chic.- On a side note, it has been confirmed that Johnny Depp is playing the Riddler and Hoffster is playing the Penguin in the next Batman movie!!!!!!!!! I am going to nerd it out and see the first show at midnight n’ shit! YESSIR!OH, I remember absolutely dry heaving when I saw Whoopi Goldberg’s dress.!! Leopard is cool. Chiffon is cool. Ruffles are cool Altogether= WORST. THING.EVER.

The wins weren’t surprising. I was really ROOTING for Uncle Mickey (Rourke), but am pleased with the Sean Penn win. I’m also not surprised. Gay wins always.This also works in my favor because I want to work with Mickey and an Oscar would mean no return phone calls.Yay for Slumdog!!! I did get concerned when all the kids from the movie were on the stage in the end and I could see Angelina’s eyes filled with GLEE as she saw them. Oh she can save them from a tragic life in Mumbai slums! They are already so well trained. They are brown-they’ll do!!! Hopefully they won’t CHIMP OUT on her.

I think award show season is OVER. I can relax and put the gowns away-but the hate remains out n’ ready!

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