Thursday, August 20, 2009

The Place Where I Work: Its Not You, Its Me

Miss Jackson said it best..."let's wait awhile...before we go too far..."
Should have heeded her advice, but of course I didn't.
Instead, I allowed for MIT and I to go further-i.e. yesterday and our food/'sex' experience.
Too much, too soon.
Now, he and The Dude want to have lunch with me. Doesn't he understand that I have lunch buddies (who are REAL friends) already and am not trying to chill with these peeps like that?
In the office world, they are characters in the daily show of life that earns me money but gets no air time....but in real life, that would mean having a real conversation and real possible death/cloning for me.
MIT didn't do the Shake Shack at the Mets game yesterday (he did BlueSmoke instead which is great as well!!) because he thinks The Dude, he and I should all go to the one in Madison Park (which is kinda a trek from the office).
I may have smiled and mumbled something about the line being too long or me being scared that I would be double teamed by death- and then went back to my desk to work on a project involving spreadsheets and numbers.

This is kinda how I am with guys I like-in REAL life- where I get all flirty n' playful and once they show an interest I am like...wait- who? Me? ....and I get all bashful and idiotic.
Its really sad.
Though this time its not about me liking the peeps here like that, its just that I have them in this special place. They are my daily office characters. I see them from 9-5:30. I go home and don't think about them till the next time I am in the office.
If I start having lunch with The Dude and MIT...what's next? Tea with Bourgeois Black Mama and Typical Movie Admin? Am I really going to boat with Older Matt Damon? Will I go shopping at Joyce Leslie with Candy purchasing pleather leggings and bra tops?

**sidebar** Speaking of Candy, I happen to be up front when the mail was delivered. Candy is on vacay. The mail person was like oh you're not Candy! I said nope. Then they said that I looked like her though.
Not for nothing, but Candy and I look NOTHING alike. NOTHING. Only similarity is that we are both tall, Black, and female. That is it. Not to say Candy isn't attractive, but we look NOTHING alike. Its the whole 'we' all look a like thing-which the mail person, being an Asian woman wouldn't like if I said she looked JUST like Jackie Chan.
Not cool.
Also...I happened to glance at Candy's phone and there is a speed dial set for someone named Diamond. I'm just sayin'.
**sidebar out**

So, no. I don't intend on having any of these people become a part of my life. I don't think they're horrible, but I like my what IF we do happy hour and I let it slip that I blog. DoubleDeuce AKA my editor would have me by the BALLS! (if I had any)

THEN. THEN! I went for my afternoon crack attack AKA Starbucks fix and asked if anybody wanted anything because I am nice like that. TMA wanted something and because my SB Crew loves them some Honey T, they gave me a sweet discount-even on her drink.
I go to give her her change-which she didn't expect- and I explained what happened...and may have said that they love me down there. The Dude heard this and was like of course they do...EVERYONE loves you (non-sarcastic).
Then BBM and MIT wanted me to help them with decorating idea's for MIT's office.
Its like they're accepting me...and want me to be part of them...and I am getting like Dave Chappelle's version of Daylon (formerly of Diddy's Making The Band crap- I mean show) and flailing my arms going: too close, too close!!

Everyone back away from the honey colored woman. Let's resume small talk and typical awkward office behavior. Resume treating me as the lowly temp. Do not be taken in by my sparkling personality. Do not want to have lunch with me. Do not expect too much from me because I've been here before and this is for the best.
Don't make this harder than it needs to be.


  1. For real, OF COURSE they love you! I worked with you I'd be trying to creep, too! This is getting tricky, though.

    p.s. What's up with blogspot not letting me cut/paste within this comment box? Weak!

  2. will check that out and HOLLA! heads will roll!